I got felt up on the bus today.
The bus was pretty full. I was sitting on an inside seat looking out the window. The person next to me snapped and got off and a man sat down. I didn’t look at him, it’s something I generally avoid. But I did see out of the corner of my eye that he had a big bag with him. I felt something touch me and I figured it was the bag since he was still shuffling around and getting settled in the seat. I moved my arm anyway, then felt it again. Just as I looked down to see his hand on me he snapped and got off. By the time the synapses in my brain connected what was going on it was too late for me to do anything. It happened really fast.
How do I feel about it? Like a huge idiot.
I’m disappointed in myself for not realizing quicker what was happening. He got away with it and thats upsetting.
It’s not the first time something like that has happened here. This was perhaps the most blatant, though. Everytime something like this happens I think that the next time I’ll be ready with the right response and right way to handle the situation. But I’m always caught off guard.
I don’t want to be scared and constantly on guard against every man that sits next to me on the bus. Even before this I’ve been realizing that, out of necessity, I have become slightly wary of every new non-ex-pat man I interact with here. There are different cultual norms. I have to be kind of a jerk sometimes. I hate that. But its better than accidentally sending the wrong message. …Which I can still do just by my mere presence, apparently.
Being a woman here, esspecially a single woman, is really hard. …But I don’t want to become hardened.
I dunno. Forgiving him, and myself, and will try to find my voice more quickly if there is a next time.